Am I Lazy?

 

Hello Everyone, Charming Eddie here. The sun is out and it is quite warm. I enjoy sunning. But, I was asking Mom where all the grass went! She tells me it will fill in soon.

You might not believe this, but she says I am lazy! I am not lazy, I just like to take my time and not waste energy. Maybe she could offer up delicious treats more often and I would run to get mine.

I remember telling you all about the diet food she is feeding us dogs. I haven't lost an ounce! See what conserving your energy will do? Toni always eats first, with Bo sneaking a bite when her mouth is full and she is chewing. I can tell you from experience that it is hard to growl while chewing! I prefer to have the entire bowl to myself and take my time. I do not growl at Bo, I bark at him!

All of us dogs have been very good about waiting to go outside to pee and poop. Mom has been praising us about it. She still puts pee pads down, just in case. It has come to the attention of everyone in our house that Toni Louise will not pee on a pee pad. Unfortunately she likes to pee in the middle of the floor, where people walk. Mom tried putting the pee pad in the middle of the floor, but Toni just peed next to it. Mom is the one who always ends up stepping in it. Mom always wears socks in the house and is quite unhappy when her socks get wet.

A couple of days ago it was raining really hard with thunder and lightning all morning. It is a well known fact that Toni Louise is afraid of storms and gets very anxious. Her entire body trembles and she hides behind furniture, sometimes she hides behind the toilet! She was in such a state when we awoke and Mom held her for as long as Toni would let her. When the rain lightened up, she opened the door and sent us out to do our business. Only me and Bo went, though. Toni cowered behind Dad's chair.

Finally, when she could hold it no longer, Toni peed on the floor, right in the middle of the room. I saw it, and so did Bo. Why did she have to ruin our record of not peeing on the floor in a month? We waited to see if Mom would step in it, but she saw it and cleaned it up. She did not scold Toni Louise at all! She talked to her and told her that she knew she was scared and it was okay this one time. I am thinking maybe Bo and I should also be scared .... then I remembered how much effort it would take to tremble and decided it would be easier to just go outside. Maybe I am lazy, after all.

Today it is raining, but with no noise. Toni doesn't mind that. We ate our food while Mom and Dad had their breakfast. Upon finishing, Toni walked around the house, then went to the door and barked. This is her signal that she wants to go out. Bo will whimper softly and turn in circles. I just stand there and wait until someone notices me at the door, preserving all my valuable energy.

When Toni barked to go out this morning, Dad looked up and said, "NO!" to her. We were confused, though not surprised, as Dad might just be conserving the energy it would take to get up and take two steps to the door and let her out. Mom scolded him and said that we had just eaten and probably needed to go out. Dad made some kind of mumbly reply that not even Mom could understand. Mom is good at interpreting things, although I have heard her say that Dad is a mystery. She likes mysteries, is that why she married him?

Then, later, it happened. Dad got up and headed to the bathroom. Mom saw him and yelled "NO" to him! He looked confused and she asked him how he liked it. Our Mom is the best! Us dogs laughed and laughed. That is all I have to say, it is time for morning nap # 2!