Somehwere Over The Rainbow

 

This is a picture of Cujo the day I met him and he chose me to give him a furever home.

HeWho suggested we did not need another dog was smitten by my sweet boy. Need is not the issue, unless you might be thinking that Cujo needed a home.

What a handsome specimen he was. A timid creature who ate so fast he would throw up. He shied from other dogs, as well as humans. He mainly wanted to be held. By me. He became my contant companion, following me where ever I went and waiting patiently at the end of the day for me to lock up and return to his space.

He grew old and gray, losing his teeth and vision, but still wanting nothing more than to be snuggled next to me. No longer running and playing with his furry siblings, he was content to just sit in my lap and bark at them occasionally. He barked at HeWho everytime he left or returned. I would scoop him up in my arms and soothe him and sometimes grew impatient with his bark and would scold him.

Last night we went to bed as usual. Cujo was restless and did not take his usual place in bed. He jumped down and I heard him lapping water from his bowl. I was watching TV and waiting for him to come to the side of the bed and wait to be picked up. I grew drowsy and fell asleep. This morning Cujo came from under the bed to greet me and Eddie as we made our way to the back door. Bo joined us and they all went out.

Eddie and Bo returned as I was making coffee. I looked out and saw him gagging and retching. Not unusual, as he likes to eat grass in the morning. I sat drinking coffee and watching an episode of The Crown. I left the door open for Cujo and Martha to come in. 

HeWho woke and while he was dressing I asked him to check on Cujo, as he had yet to come back in. He found him dead on the ground. I feel so awful that I wasn't there for my little dog and he died all alone. I did not get to hold him and kiss his sweet head and tell him how much I loved him this morning while he was still alive. Oh, I did hold him and kiss him, I hope he heard me as I told him to go find Oscar and Wall-E.

My heart hurts. He seemed fine last night on the couch as we sat together and I later carried him to bed. He did not seem to be in any pain this morning. Nothing at all out of the ordinary. I will miss my sweet little dog and be sad for a long time. Eddie is sad and even Bo is subdued. Such an awful day.